Loving and Being Loved

Welcome to our discussion based on Joe C.’s Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life. We post choice quotes from the daily reading, as well as the discussion questions, and encourage you to think on it and respond in the comments. Please keep our community guidelines in mind while commenting.

Solitude is a lifestyle choice; isolation is a defense…Isolation occurs when human connection feels impossible. Foisting ourselves onto others to have our needs met is no solution to this problem.

…There is no step in the Twelve Steps on domestic or romantic bliss. Being able to play nice is one of the secondary benefits of recovery. Step Eight reveals how we are, in part, the architects of our own romantic misfortune. Forgiving ourselves and forgiving others opens the door to harmony in a relationship or in solitude. In Step Nine we express the regret we uncover for how our needs made us selfish, manipulative and cruel. Our pain and our hunger are not excuses. We aren’t negotiating forgiveness. We are coming clean and acknowledging the harm we have done.

Discussion questions

  • Do the lyrics, “come to your senses…let somebody love you, before it’s too late,” resonate with me?