Sacrificing Relief for the Right Action

Welcome to our discussion based on Joe C.’s Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life. We post choice quotes from the daily reading, as well as the discussion questions, and encourage you to think on it and respond in the comments. Please keep our community guidelines in mind while commenting.

Being right, or seeking oblivion, comfort or numbness, as we learned in Step One, can be obsessions that form a power greater than us. Many of us planned on stopping tomorrow, or being good tomorrow. But when the rubber hit the road we clung to the familiar, sought relief and put off the right action for another day.

Discussion questions

  • Do I put people, places and things in front of being good for goodness’s sake?
  • Is being good more righteous than getting good rewards?

Secular Sobriety Discussion: Pace, Prioritization, and Perfectionism

Welcome to our discussion based on Joe C.’s Beyond Belief: Agnostic Musings for 12 Step Life. We post choice quotes from the daily reading, as well as the discussion questions, and encourage you to think on it and respond in the comments. Please keep our community guidelines in mind while commenting.

Perfectionism and impatience sidetrack sober, balanced living, and they are worth understanding. Do we ever forget we are human? Do we ever forget to ask for help? Some of us are workaholics and all of us have workaholics who impact our lives. Some of us are doubly blessed or double-losers, depending on how you look at concurrent disorders. Imbalance in work can lead to other addictions. There is no making up for lost time–that’s an illusion. Impatience may be part of a chaotic life that kept things way too busy for touchy-feely time. Sometimes we are rushing for arbitrary self-imposed deadlines. What’s that about? If we don’t have time to do it right, how do we always find time to do it over? If perfectionism or impatience pesters us in recovery, or worse yet, if we self-righteously wear our impatience or perfectionism as badges of honor, why not check in with someone about this?

Discussion questions

  • Do I come from a chaotic or dysfunctional background?
  • Have I inherited naive or unrealistic expectations?
  • Is my pace good or am I impatient?
  • Have I prioritized my day and left time for spontaneity?
  • Am I a perfectionist?
  • What does this tell me about my stage of recovery?